you WHAT quidditch?
by pathogenicmicroorganism
Summary: “You hate quidditch? HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE QUIDDITCH!” Read and review please, thanks! :
1. Chapter 1

How can you not?

"You _hate _quidditch?"

Bridgette puffed indignantly and stared at her friend. He's intelligent, but really, he can be quite thick at times. Right now, the hand holding his spoon has stopped mid-air in its course for his mouth, and he was staring at her like it was the first time he had seen her in his entire 17 years of existence.

"I do not hate quidditch, Sirius," said Bridgette coolly, and choosing her words carefully, "I just…don't like it as much as you do."

By now, Sirius has regained the control of his hand and had the spoon in his mouth. It stayed there. His eyes were still wide open and unblinking. The last time Bridgette saw him like this it was when he caught her in nothing but her underwear. Last time that happened Bridgette managed to plant an extremely large lump in his head.

"Sirius," said Bridgette concernedly, for he had been silent for an entire minute. It was at these types of moments that she showed concern for the boy. They were friends, after all, the kind of friends that shout at each other a lot, but friends nonetheless. "Are you all right?"

He mumbled something incoherent. Bridgette gave him a confused look, and Sirius promptly took the spoon off his mouth. "How can you hate quidditch?" he asked incredulously, pointing an accusatory spoon in her direction.

Bridgette sighed and pointed the spoon away from her face. "I told you," she said patiently, quidditch was a touchy subject after all. James, his other best friend, was sitting behind him with the same look of stunned disparagement in her direction. She smiled weakly at James. "I don't hate quidditch. I just don't like it."

"Oh."

There was a half a minute's silence.

"_HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE QUIDDITCH!"_ shouted Sirius indignantly, standing up and knocking pumpkin juice onto the clean table cloth.

"Sirius!" shouted Bridgette. Some of the pumpkin juice got down to her robes. "These were newly pressed!" she shouted, but her voice was no match for Sirius' extremely deep loud voice

"HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE QUIDDITCH!" said Sirius again, just as loud, with an expression of disbelief in his face. "I'VE KNOWN YOU FOR FIFTEEN YEARS, AND YOU CHOOSE NOW TO TELL ME THAT YOU HATE QUIDDITCH!"

"I told you," said Bridgette, her voice a little higher now, "I don't hate quidditch!"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!" said Sirius indignantly. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY BEST FRIEND? I WANT HER BACK!"

Bridgette sighed and massaged her eyes. She liked the fact that Sirius cared so much about her to believe that he knows everything about her, but she is a girl, and girls, unlike boys, change their ways very easily and oftentimes without any warning, making their side of the human sex extremely hard to understand. Bridgette sighed even louder. The entire Great Hall, once again, had stopped and was watching the entertainment, namely them. Remus had an amused look in him. James, who's captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch Team, was looking at her still with the same disbelieving look in his face. Well, that was understandable.

"You know what," said Lily beside her, smiling at her a little, "you really should pick your battles."

"Waters, answer me!" said Sirius suddenly. Bridgette stared at him, he has never called her Waters before, and it didn't take to her liking. True, most of the time she called him Black, but that was because saying Black requires shorter sounds, and sounds very strict everytime she starts to tell him off for something that caused him detention, which is practically everyday.

"I just don't like quidditch as much as you do!" she said. "You don't even play for the team!"

This was true. Sirius was an excellent quidditch player, a beater, and an avid flyer. Only there were better beaters and flyers for the team so James had the painful task of telling him that he wasn't in the team. Sirius took it fine, only he wouldn't talk to James for the rest of the day after that, even after James' bribes of chocolate, money and him doing his - Sirius' - homework for a whole month. Bridgette thought that he would crack once James brings up the homework part, but Sirius refused, saying that he didn't want his grades to go down a single point. James practically begged her to make him talk to him again and it took a whole night's cooing of Sirius by her to get him to start talking to James again. She liked the attention that Sirius was showering on her, but really, the boy has to get a life, and a few hours a day away from her. She rejoiced when Sirius was talking to James again, for she practically pushed Sirius in his direction, "take him! I don't want him! You have him!"

Yes, that was how the dynamics of their friendship work. It's a weird set up but they both love it, and nothing anyone else says otherwise can make them change their minds.

"Yeah, well," said Sirius, thinking quick of something to say, "at least I tried out!"

"Sirius, you've seen me fly," said Bridgette exasperatedly, "it's not very good!" Bridgette, as much as she hated to admit it, couldn't fly, and it wasn't for the lack of trying. She's just uncoordinated with brooms, or any mode of transportation that requires her to be exposed to the open air at more than 10 feet above the ground.

Sirius snorted. "That's not a reason to hate quidditch, that's a reason to hate flying." He turned to his audience. "What are you looking at?"

They faced their tables as one in one smooth motion.

Sirius gave them all a smug look and sat back down. The rest of the great hall then turned back to the entertai - er, them.

"Sirius," said Bridgette through gritted teeth. "You're getting really annoying."

"So are you."

"I told you I don't hate quidditch. I still watch the games you know."

"Only because I drag you to the field."

"No you don't"

"Yes I do."

"Name once when you had to drag me to the field to watch."

Sirius thought for a second. "During our fourth year, Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw."

Bridgette remembered and stared at him disbelievingly. "I was sick that day! I had horrible flu!"

"Yeah, well, I still had to drag you to the match!"

"I got even sicker because of you! You got sick as well!"

Sirius grinned. "You just asked me when. You didn't ask why."

Bridgette stared at him. "You're an idiot."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not!"

"Yes you are!"

James whisted. Sirius grinned. This was his favorite game, and Bridgette had to admit, it was hers too. "Time out you two," he said, enforcing his head boy authority. "Either act your age right now or go back to the common and fight there." he said, then smiled, which quickly turned into a grin and a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Personally though, I would stay and fight here, the entire student body's getting interested, and some are even starting to conjure up popcorns."

Remus then coughed and looked at Sirius and Bridgette guiltily, and they were both glaring at him. He had a very large box of popcorn sitting innocently in front of him, his wand guiltily next to it.

Bridgette tutted and stood up quickly and marched all the way out the great hall. Sirius quickly followed her and they went to the Common Room together. He kept muttering and Bridgette heard "really" and "nobody hates Quidditch". Bridgette didn't bother to answer him. She knew he wasn't really angry at her. Annoyed maybe, but not angry. Sooner or later he would calm down and start teasing him again, but Bridgette would rather it be sooner.

"Do you hate me, Siri?" said Bridgette, as they were nearing the doors out the Great Hall.

"I can never hate you," said Sirius, "you know that."

"Oh, good."

"But how can you hate Quidditch!"

They argued all the way out the Great Hall, the Entrance Hall and into the Common Room.

* * *

The next day Sirius still hasn't forgotten that Bridgette hated quidditch. It irked him that for the past fifteen years she has never once mentioned that she didn't like the sport, but she had been watching the games since the first day of the season in their first year. 

"Maybe you just never bothered to ask Padfoot," said Remus reasonably. "You did say you knew everything about her."

Yes he did say that, on more than one occasion in fact, and the fact that he found out something new about her today made her even more interesting and at the same time, mysterious. What if there were more things that he didn't know about her? Maybe he should do a bit of investigavtive work...but how? Bridgette was known to be notoriously alert of her surroundings and he should know, he had yet to scare the wits out of her by surprise and it wasn't for the lack of trying.

But right now for Sirius, his mission is to stop Bridgette from hating the game of quidditch and flying.

"Padfoot," said James, "she doesn't -"

"I know Prongs," said Sirius, "but even so, she should learn to appreciate the game more. And she would appreciate the game more if she knew how to fly."

"You'll never get her to fly." said Remus.

"Yes I will."

And he knew exactly how.


	2. Chapter 2

**You _what _quidditch?**

Who knew Saturdays could be so evil?

Bridgette staggered all the way back to the Gryffindor Common Room. It was already dusk, and she had spent the entire Saturday outside, in the Quidditch Pitch, and her body was aching all over.

I hate Sirius Black.

How could he have talked her into it? It was staring at her face, and he couldn't see it!

She made a mental note never ever to trust Sirius Black ever again.

* * *

"Relax, Bridge, _trust me_." 

Sirius has, for some reason blind folded her the exact moment that she went down to the Great Hall for breakfast that day. Immediately, she protested about some what Sirius called as a silly query about how she would be able to eat. Sirius solved that problem by feeding her buttered toast and grapes.

"Honestly, Sirius, this is ridiculous!" said Bridgette. She was extremely red, and she knew Sirius thought that she probably knew that the entire Great Hall was watching them again and wondering what on earth they were up to this time. Sirius loved the attention, and he knew she didn't, which is why he does this often.

"No it's not!" said Sirius, feeding her toast. "Nothing I do is ridiculous!"

If Sirius could see Bridgette's eyes right now, she knows that he knows that she is giving him a very pointed look, and then point at her direction, indicating that blindfolding her just before breakfast, and then spoon feeding her and doing who knows what else is extremely ridiculous. "Ok, so it's a tad bit unconventional.."

"A tad?" said Bridgette, shaking a little. "A _tad?"_

She could practically feel him grinning his head off, which only irritated her even more. "Honestly, Sirius, take this blind fold off me!"

"Can't take it yourself, Bridge?" asked James, somewhere out there.

"I put a spell on it," said Sirius proudly. Bridgette could practically see him beaming with pride, with a very mischievous grin in his overly proud and obnoxious face.

"Exactly." said Bridgette, and refused to eat another bite. "Not until this thing is off my eyes."

"Fine," said Sirius, "then I guess you're gonna starve today."

Bridgette stopped suddenly. She liked food, she liked eating food, especially the one she managed to eat before Sirius starts picking off from her plate, and there was no way that she was gonna be spoon fed by Sirius Black the entire day. She know where Sirius was, but judging from his voice, he was beside her. "Do you want me to kill you, Black?" she said in her most threatening voice.

"Now why would you kill your best friend?"

"I mean it Black."

"No you don't."

Bridgette then made a lunge at him. It was her futile attempt to grab him by the throat and throttle him until he _pleads _with her to let him go so he can take off the blindfold. She caught him for one second, but the piece of cloth that she managed to grab quickly slipped from her hands. She cursed and wondered for a split second to ask Sirius where he got such gorgeous fine silk before she lost her balance, and fell off the bench, right into the floor, banging her head.

"Bridge!" shouted Sirius, and she felt his hand on her head. It was an extremely hard fall, and she already felt the lump on her head forming. "Ow..." was all she can say.

"Sorry," said Sirius softly beside her. rubbing her head gently. "I shouldn't have gone away from you. Sorry."

She smiled, although she wasn't sure where he was. "Aww.." she said. "You _do _care."

"Of course I care!" he said rather incredulously. "What if you get hurt?"

"I did get hurt."

"And we better make sure it doesn't happen again!" And with that Bridgette felt herself being lifted quite suddenly from the ground. It was so sudden that she blindly grabbed for something, anything to hold on to, and she grabbed on most likely Sirius' neck.

"What the hell!"

"Language, Bridge," tutted Sirius.

"I think my language is not the issue right now, Sirius!" aid Bridgette loudly. "Where the hell are you taking me? AND TAKE OFF THIS RUDDY BLINDFOLD FRIGGIN RIGHT NOW!"

Sirius stayed silent for a full minute. "No."

"SIRIUS!

"I said no," he said as if that made any point at all.

Bridgette dropped her head and resigned to the fact that the day can't get worse if she can't see what she's doing.

Realizing that she wouldn't be able to see what she was doing, she punched Sirius in the chest. "GET THIS BLOODY THING OFF ME RIGHT NOW!"

* * *

Still with the blindfold on, Bridgette felt the warm cool breeze and concluded that they were outside, where there were no trees anywhere near, and if she dared to guess, it was an open field. 

That meant only one thing.

"GET THIS BLOODY THING OFF ME NOW OR I SWEAR I WILL STICK A BROOM UP YOUR ARSE!"

"I'd like to see you find a broom first," taunted Sirius.

Bridgette was getting angry. She liked being able to see, thank you very much, and the fact that she was practically using Sirius as a guide dog infuriated her more. It was three things: one, she has to rely on Sirius, two, she knew Sirius was loving it, and three, he would taunt her to no end.

Though they were the best of friends, Bridgette really figured Sirius out more as someone she can talk to, to tease when he starts to like someone, to annoy when she bored and has nothing better to do, to vent out anger on when she lands herself in another detention with Filch for stuffing his cat in one of the knights, to dance with joyously when she gets an Outstanding grade and to finish her food when she's on a diet, not one to help her with anything. She was Bridgette Waters after all, she didn't need help from anyone, much less from someone named Sirius Black. She prided herself on despite having a lot of friends to lean on to, she was quite the independent lady.

The taunting didn't help much either.

"All right," said Bridgette, crossing her arms over her chest, "what are we doing here in the quidditch pitch? Because if you think that hoisting me in a broom blind folded will get me over hating flying, then you don't know me too well."

"What's so bad about flying?" said Sirius, with a tone like he never heard of such a ridiculous thing in his entire life.

"Just because you dream of stealing a motorcycle one day and jinxing it so it can fly doesn't mean the same holds true for me, Sirius." she answered, although the thought did put a smile in her face. She made a mental note: On his next birthday, buy Sirius a motorcycle and watch as he rides his wrongly jinxed motorcycle up into the sky. (She's sure he's gonna get the spell wrong, she can feel it).

"When I get that motorcycle, you're going to ride it."

"Over my dead cold rotting body," dismissed Bridgette. "Now can you please take this bloody blindfold off me? I don't like the dark much."

"Awww..." cooed Sirius, "is ickly-wittle-Bwidgette too scawed off the dark?"

"Yes, ickle-little-Bridgette is scared of the dark," she snapped, "now take this off, please, I'm already asking nicely!"

Sirius sighed and obliged to take the blindfold off. "You just have no idea what fun is do you?"

"Sure I do," smiled Bridgette, "you taking the blindfold off and then me walking away without having to look at a single broomstick in the process."

Sirius stared. "That's no fun!"

"Yes it is!"

"No it's not!"

"Yes it is!"

"No it's not!"

"Yes, it - AAAAAAAHHHH!" Bridgette screamed one of those highly pitched screams girls can do and boys can only cringe and cover their ears at. A broom had come underneath both Bridgette and Sirius and was quickly taking them up at the sky. Bridgette was still screaming as she grabbed onto Sirius with all the strength she could muster. She didn't even care if the tightness of her hold was cutting off the circulation in his lungs.

"STOP SCREAMING!" shouted Sirius, over his shoulder, "my eardrums are gonna blow up!"

Bridgette stopped screaming. He did care for the boy just enough to not blow his eardrums up with his high pitched girly scream, which she didn't feel the need to cover up because after all, she is a girl. Having a born trait of being afraid of heights, her in a broomstick a few hundred feet up in the air behind Sirius who was looking incredibly comfortable flying, she bit her tongue to stop herself from screaming any more and closed her eyes, burying her face in Sirius' back and saying to herself. "Ohmanohmanohmanohman..."

"It's not so bad really Bridge," said Sirius casually, looking over his shoulder to her, "just like in the ground, only much windier."

Bridgette removed her face from his back and glared directly at Sirius, quite rigidly, as she made it her mission never ever to look down during the entire duration of this ride. True, it was windier, and it did feel good in the face, but the fact is she is about a hundred feet above ground, and the possibility to fall is more than likely.

"Can we get down now," she said, quite worriedly. She decided to employ this tactic as she knew that Sirius couldn't resist her when she starts to feel scared, and that he would be wrapped around her beautifully manicured little finger. "I don't like this very much."

"That's why we're up here, Bridge," said Sirius, laughing, "to make you change your mind." And with that he did a bunch of loop-d-loops, which only resulted in nothing but the resumption of Bridgette's high pitched screams.

When they came to level again, Bridgette was looking extremely winded, while Sirius was acting like this was the time of his life. "Can we get down now, please?" asked Bridgette, and she was threatening to start crying.

For Sirius' answer, he made the broom swerve from left to right to left to right again and again and again until Bridgette, trying to be brave by keeping her eyes open, couldn't take it anymore and returned to burying her face in Sirius' back.

After ten more minutes, "Can we get down now?" she whined, tears started to fall down, both from fear and the overwhelming desire to throttle Sirius right then and there. Of course, that would be useless because she wouldn't know how to go down, so she decided to throttle him the moment they get down on solid firm ground. "I wanna go back to where my feet can feel the ground, thanks very much!"

"Aw, but Bridge! I was just starting to have fun."

Bridgette punched his back. "Do you want me to knock you off this broom?"

"You wouldn't do that!" laughed Sirius, "you'll fall off the broom too!"

Bridgette cursed inwardly. The empty threat didn't do anything, Sirius just knew her too well. "Can we go down now?" asked Bridgette again.

"Sure," said Sirius simply.

Before Bridgette could voice her amazement of having such a quick answer, they went in for a dive.

Bridgette couldn't hold back her screams anymore.

And for some amazing reason, they levelled just before hitting the ground and landed softly, much to the applause of many of the students that came to watch.

Sirius bowed low for them while Bridgette was standing up shaking both from having felt like she was being torn to a million pieces on the way down and the relief that they were in the ground again and the fact that she should just throttle, stab, and then cut Sirius into pieces and distribute his many body parts all over the castle right now.

Sirius looked at her and opened his mouth but -

"I HATE YOU! I NEVER WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN! YOU STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME! GO TO HELL! DON'T YOU DARE COME ANYWHERE NEAR ME FOR MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE OR I SWEAR I WILL CURSE YOU INTO OBLIVION AND LEAVE NOTHING BEHIND BUT A SMOKE AND THE MYSTERY OF YOUR DISAPPEARANCE! I HATE YOU! YOU GOT IT? I HATE YOU!"

Sirius blinked several times before he looked at her casually and said, "Piggyback?"

Bridgettegrinned and nodded, "Okay." she said, and Sirius carried her all the way back into the castle, and talking joyously about the events of the morning, and what they were having for lunch and if Sirius could pick off Bridgette's plate, and Bridgette laughing and smacking him lightly in the head, no doubt her punishment for making them dive bomb all the way to the ground. She thought about it, and if she throttled, stabbed and chopped Sirius into a hundred different pieces, then she won't have anyone to annoy, vent off anger to, tease and all the other stuff they did.

They left behind a group of stunned students, most of them girls, who were for one joyful second, was rejoicing because of the end of the friendship of Sirius Black and Bridgette Waters, and the next horror struck as they watched Sirius carry her all the way back to the castle. Poor things, they had always wished that they were the ones that Sirius devoted his entire attention to...

The End


End file.
